The A+ way to deal with a friend break-up


Sophomore Maggie Quine pouts over the loss of a friend. Photo by Jayden Jones.

You always hear about the inevitable endings of friendships that happen in high school. Older siblings or parents that have been through high school have already tried to warn you about this. People mature and find who they are as they grow up; it’s a part of life. It’s unavoidable. Knowing that this will happen doesn’t make it any easier. The only thing to do in this situation is to learn how to manage it.

Acknowledging that you were hurt is the first step. It’s alright to be hurt by whatever happened. You have a right to your own feelings and express them so long as that won’t hurt anyone else. Acknowledgement may also mean that you recognize if you were in the wrong at any point in this relationship or friendship.

Audience, or those around you, is incredibly important. These are the people that will be your support system during this time. Having those friends around will remind you that you aren’t alone and you have them too. This doesn’t mean that the time of loss will be painless, but it will definitely be easier with the right peers around you.

Analyze what happened in the friendship and what could’ve possibly gone wrong. Perhaps there were signs that you missed that something wasn’t right. Maybe your friend simply just needs some time to work through something. Now, this doesn’t mean harping on every aspect of the relationship. Let your past with this person exist, don’t manipulate the memories in your mind to become toxic.

Address the issues, if there are any. If there was a disagreement, this is the time to work it out even if you choose to remain apart. Once you address the issue, you should apologize for anything you may have done to hurt the other person. This will make you feel lighter and make you a better person in the long run.

“Sometimes we outgrow those around us, and it hurts bit people are distracted from the fact that t can be a positive change in the long run,” senior Jason Madden said.

Angles are everything. Instead of looking at the time, you spent together as what you won’t have anymore, look at it as a nice memory. Ultimately, it ended for a reason, even if you aren’t sure of the reason. Those fun times are over and having this outlook on them will make it easier to digest. If you dwell on the times that won’t happen anymore it will only leave a bitter taste in your mouth. For a while, looking at these memories will hurt but with each day the sting will lessen.

“Everything happens for a reason and you just have to settle down and realize how losing a close friend is a part of something bigger and better,” Madden said.

Accepting that this person won’t be in your life anymore is the final step. Acceptance is arguably the most difficult part of this process. No longer wondering what could be, no longer wishing things turned out differently. That is when you know you’ve moved past the break-up.

“losing a friend is just a small detail of the large picture of life,” Madden said.